Yes All Women and the Double Standards

Hello fellow humans! Let us change the mood of this blog for a serious post. In case you haven’t been online these past couple of days, in Santa Barbra, a 22-year-old white male killed 6 people. In a manifesto that he posted to YouTube, he claimed that girls gave their “affection and sex” to other men but him. He claimed that it wasn’t fair that girls were never attracted to him and therefore should be punished for that. You can watch the manifesto online, but be warned, it is creepy.

There are many debates from this. Gun control, women equality issues are the top two. For me, I want to focus on women equality issues on this blog post.

I think that society needs to change. This isn’t the 1800s. Women need to be treated with more respect, and be treated as equals with men. I am not trying to preach that men are evil or that all men as jerks, but we need to acknowledge that these issues still exist.

When a school tells a girl on a hot day that she cannot wear a tank top because it is too distracting, but a boy can wear a shirt that says “Cool story babe, now go make me a sandwich”, there is something wrong. When I have to tell a boy at a bar that I have boyfriend instead of saying that I am not interested, then that is a problem. When I wear a low-cut shirt I should not be afraid that someone will try to throw something down my shirt (because that has happened to me). When a guy tells my friend that she wears too much makeup or that she needs to wear makeup when he is coming over, that is a huge problem. When we have to tell girls at a young age to defend themselves because we cannot tell boys to respectful and be a decent person, then there is something wrong.  When women get offended, we are told to take it as a joke instead of receiving an apology. The list can go on for a while. See the issue now?

There is a whole double standards, that unfortunately, I am only noticing now. As a girl, I was told to cover up, because it would give boys the “wrong idea.” As a 22-year-old, I am starting to wonder what the “wrong idea” is. Are women sexualized that much, to the point that a high school girl got kicked out of prom because some FATHERS could not keep it in their pants? What about breast feeding? Boobs were meant to feed a baby, but people still, in 2014, have a problem with that. Every case about a women’s sexuality is never replicated with a male.

Remember the college porn star? Would she have gotten the same attention if she was a male? When a prostitute is arrested, why is she the only one and not the guys she slept with? Or even her pimp?

And don’t get me started on rape cases. I am tired of old white MEN saying that rape is a form of birth control, or that the rapist should get child visitation rights, or a child custody case, OR THE OPTION TO NOT HAVE IT ABORTED. Can’t say I approve of abortions BUT IT IS NOT MY BODY.  No one should have domain over my body.

We, as a modern society, need to change. Stop victim blaming. Stop harassing. Stop teaching girls to be ashamed for being born a girl. Stop trying to hide women.

The #YesAllWomen tag on Twitter was not going to solve the problem, but it helped open a dialogue about these issues. The tag was not meant to say all men are bad, but to “say that yes all women has experienced a moment when they faced harassment.” And if you think about that, the women are the people close to you. Your friend, your teacher, your mother, your sister, your wife, your girlfriend, your own daughter.

I do not feel sorry for the shooter. Not one bit. If I see one news station defending him, or someone saying that it was his mental illness, I am going to kick someone. not really but I’ll do something productive  He was a misogynistic man who was not a decent human being. He needed help and a reality check, but I do not feel any pity for him. No man is entitled to a woman. No man has control over a woman. This notion of the “friend-zone” needs to stop.

It’s time to change, people. It is time to start acting like 2014 instead of the generations are great-great-great grandparents lived in. It’s time to start showing what humanity is all about. Teach boys to be kind and respectful. Teach girls to not be ashamed of themselves and to expect more out of men. Teach humanity.

#YesAllWomen

 

 

You Can Make Mistakes, It’s Okay.

Right-o. Hello folks! Sorry for the lack of update, I’ve been feeling the pressure at school. I have three assignments due on the same day this upcoming month, plus, I have weekly presentations, and my thesis work (which I am receiving no supervisor support at the moment) so I have been feeling the stress. Today, however, I decided  to take the day off and just bum around. I caught up on my shows, went for a nice walk along Bridge of Allan, and ate junk food. It was grand.

Today, I want to talk about making mistakes and big choices. I have friends right now who have their life figured out. They have a goal and a plan. I also have friends who do not. They have a dream, and willpower. Either one, I feel, is a great thing.

My sister just turned 16 this year, and already she is stressing out about AP classes, and SAT scores, and what she wants to do in life to get a decent job. And then, I think about. She is 16! 16! How is she going to know what she wants at age 30, when she doesn’t even know what she wants to watch on Netflix? They should be worrying about trying to figure out themselves, and their personality than figuring out what job they want to do for the rest of their lives.

In high school, we are told what to do, how to think, what we should wear, even what we should eat. Then, during senior year, you are asked to make the choices that will dictate your life. We aren’t living in the 1800s. We are advanced now that we should have time to decide what we want to do in life.

We live in a society that sees mistakes as failures and not signs that we are growing up.

So, my advice to all you people reading this. Go out and make mistakes. Join a sports team. Find a hobby you are passionate about. Watch a lot of anime. Read comics and manga. Read a good book.

It’s okay. We don’t have to rush into things right now. We can take our time. Let us figure who we are and what we want before we decide our lives. It’ll work out in the end for us.

That is all for now. Sorry for the short post. Until next time.

College Porn Star

Okay calm your hormones people. We are talking about porn stars. But, not really. On the Huffington Post, I’ve been reading about this story in which they found out that this undergrad at Duke University is appearing in adult films aka porn.

I really REALLY do not see what the big deal is. I am sorry, but I cannot see why people are making such a fuss about it. Like she is not hurting anyone in the process, and if you are so disgusted by porn, then don’t buy it. I feel bad for the girl. She is over here trying to make a living , WHILE GETTING AN EDUCATION AT A PRESTIGIOUS UNIVERSITY, and they are putting her on full blast. Obviously she didn’t want people to know what she was doing. It seems like she is not ashamed, and is open about it, but I am pretty sure the reason she concealed her identity in the first place was so that she didn’t have to receive the Internet hate and such.

What is with people telling her to die? She is a slut? There are other rude things that they say as well.  Again, as I mentioned on my last post, there are probably worse people in the world than those who do porn.

She said that she took on this job because of Duke’s $60,000 a year tuition. Girl. I feel you.  Albright College was about 42,000 a year, and I am already feeling the pressure. Plus, doing a Masters. I might as well sink in a hole. And, if you are saving “Well, there are claims that she is buying expensive handbags, etc.,” So what? She made that money fair and square. There is nothing illegal about it. You know that you are all just hating because you want all those things as well.

There is a bigger issue at hand here. I mean, if she felt that porn was the only way to pay for college, isn’t that saying something? I mean she must have thought it was worth it  if her only two options were take a big loan that you will have to pay back the rest of your life, or graduate debt-free while doing porn. I’ll tell you this much, I wish I graduated with no debt. All you haters who keep saying “Well, she should have gone to a cheaper uni” or “She could think of some other job.” Obviously, you have money. This girl should go to a top-notch school. She should get the education that she wants. SHE GOT INTO DUKE SO SHE OBVIOUSLY has a brain.  How about we focus on making higher education affordable and at a decent price., so that everyone can get it, or at least not have to take these kind of side jobs. I really don’t think she wants to stay in porn after she graduates with her degree.

Maybe that is also a reason she didn’t want to reveal her name.  I hope that she gets a decent job after this, it is a shame that companies will judge her for this. Remember what the Bible said kids, “Let he who is without sin cast the first stone.”

That is my take on this debate (why are people even debating this?). There is obviously much worse things this girl could be doing to support her education. I mean, at least she is not suing her parents for tuition money. As always, if you are reading this, what do you guys think? Drop me a comment. I’d love to hear what you have to say. Thanks for reading.

 

That School Lunch Debate

The other day, I was reading an article on how this bus driver got fired for posting on his Facebook wall about how angry he was when a child came onto the bus hungry because he didn’t get to eat lunch since it was taken away from him for being short on a couple of cents. Now, he was fired for posting on his Facebook (which is another debate in itself), and there has been some claims that the child did in fact eat, but still, this isn’t the first time this issue has happened.

Some of you may remember the Salt Lake City Incident, in which 32 school lunches were taken away from students and thrown out because they had an outstanding balance on their accounts. I understand that the school district is working on a budget, but seriously, there is a better way for them to get their message across to students and parents.  Some of them said that they had no idea that their balance was running low.

This has happened to my sister in elementary school. She was short about .15 cents and they denied her lunch. Like legit took her food away. She came home crying and starving. My mother and father were furious. For .15 cents? Really? And, to make it worse, they most likely threw the food away. My sister now carries extra money, and not just for herself, for the occasional classmate that forgets or is short.

Here is my take on the debate. LET THE CHILDREN EAT. It is not that parents are not willing to pay, most just forget to refill the account balance. It happens. It is not the end of the world, but are you really going to throw away perfectly ( debatable in most cases) edible food? Not to sound like a parent, but THERE ARE STARVING CHILDREN IN THE COUNTRY. I don’t have to go around the world to say that poverty is hitting close to home.  I hate that the district feels that it is right to waste food instead of just giving the child some slack. Really, no one should ever have their lunch taken away from them, only to have it thrown out in the end.

Also, don’t give me the spiel about how some families are qualified for free/reduced lunch. BS. It is the same when apply for financial aid. On paper, you may look like you have enough money to survive, but they forget that you have to pay other things as well. Mortgage, heating, telephone, water, car payments, maybe even hospital bills. You also have three children who need clothes, FOOD, books, and who doesn’t want to spoil them once-in-a-while. It may look good on paper, but that is not always the case. I just don’t get what people do not understand about this.

Again, it is not that the parents do NOT want to pay the lunch fee (it may be the case sometimes), but it happens. Or, sometimes, maybe the child has forgotten to remind the parent, or bring their lunch money (Lord knows I have done that once or twice). Really, bless the lunch ladies/men at schools who let kids slide for a couple of cents. There is nothing worse than getting food taken away from you. What are we in? A prison?

In short, I am not pleased by these recent articles about schools publicly taking away the school lunches of children. I think there needs to be a review about how cases like these are handled. I mean, the school district doesn’t even make a profit from selling school lunches. It is understandable that they want to settle accounts, but if they are just going to throw it away, then might as well let them eat it.  I’m just saying, there is so much more school districts have to worry about than taking lunch away from children.

To whoever is reading this, please comment and tell me your take on it.

Cheaters Never Win.

If you haven’t been reading tabloids, or actually  have a life other than celebrity gossip, then you haven;t heard how Twilight actress Kristen Stewart cheated on her boyfriend (and fellow Twilight co-star) Robert Pattinson with the director of Snow White and the Huntsmen, Rupert Sanders. The affair was outed when incriminating photos of the two were posted all over the Internet. Stewart has already issued an apology to Pattinson and I think it is safe to say that the relationship is over. Reportedly, Pattinson asked her to move out of the house they shared.  (Though I think the picture of U-Haul truck was a set up.

I don’t condone cheating. I think it is stupid and, while I know everyone has their reason, I think that it is a cowardly move. I don’t feel bad the photos were leaked, but it was bound to happen. Especially if you are a celebrity. How long did she think that would be a secret?

That being said, I feel sorry for Stewart. Yes, she cheated, but it takes two to cheat. I have seen more media coverage on Stewart’s cheating, but none on Sanders. I mean, he is 41-years-old with two young children and a wife! He is an adult. Kristen Stewart is 22-years-old and has stupid roles in stupid movies, she is still young and to be honest, maybe still a teenager (heck, I feel like I am still 17-years-old).

Does that make sense? Why is Stewart the one that gets most of the blame? There is still a horny 40-year-old in this picture. What did he get? Basically a slap on the wrist, because his wife, Liberty Ross, took him back. (For the kids, but still.) Can we talk about how messed up this is? Why isn’t anyone saying that Sanders is the home-wrecker? For all we know, it could have been him who started the affair. She is just 22-years-old, do you really think she knows any better? AND I AM NOT SAYING I SUPPORT KRISTEN STEWART, SHE IS JUST TO BLAME AS SANDERS. She has to learn from her mistakes, but come’on the dude is twice her age. This just screams horny man. It is just that it seems that Sanders got the easy way out.

On another note, thanks to ONTD comments, I have seen a bunch of pictures of young girls saying that they support Kristen Stewart……….. I mean how dumb can you be? SHE CHEATED ON HER BOYFRIEND! Yes, he cheated too, but I don’t see I support Rupert Sanders pictures anywhere. I hope that these girls know that cheating is not right. I mean, don’t they teach self-respect anymore? I saw one girl who wrote the “Sh** was Kristen’s favorite word.” Now, I am not Saint in the cussing department, but I know that it is not cute.

In short, cheating is bad. It takes two to cheat, so they should both be equally in trouble. And little girls should think before they post pictures of themselves, because it makes them look dumb.

What do you guys think? Comment below and tell me! I’d love to hear it.